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Are you ‘Shoulding’ all over yourself?

This has come up a lot lately with coaches so I had to write about it. Do you find yourself saying things like; 

“I should be making more money by now.”

“I should be blogging more consistently.”

“I should have a bigger email list by now.”

“I should be making as much as (insert your colleague/competition name here).”

“I should be feeling better about my business by now.”

“I should…

“I should…

You shouldn’t, shouldn’t you? Or should you? May 19 Are You Shoulding All Over Yourself Www .jennifer -trask .comshould

In 3 years working with coaches this is one of the biggest ways coaches shoot themselves in the foot. Please stop doing this!!! Stop ‘SHOULDING’ all over yourself (and don’t let those who do it to you, bug you!)

You SHOULD be happy where you are right now and if you are not then you most absolutely should do something about it. But the one thing you shouldn’t do is feel bad, shameful or guilty about where you are. Why? Because that negative emotion is stopping you from taking positive action that is going to yield you the actual results you want in your business. 

When you stay in the ‘Should’ state you are essentially feeling bad about the past (which you can not change) or about something you are more than likely not going to do anyways. So please, just stop doing it.

It’s not helping your business. It’s not helping your impact and it’s definitely not helping your bank account. 

So, what is the next step that you should (pun intended) do? I’m so glad you asked… 

  1. Discover where you are. 
  2. Discover where you want to go. 
  3. Ask yourself, what do I need to go from where I am to where I want to go? 
  4. Find your answer and go get it. 

Make a marketing calendar, hire a coach, take a program, make the opt-in and Facebook ad. Whatever it is, start taking action now and stop feeling bad about not taking action in the past. The past is over and you can’t do anything about it. So make peace with where you are. 

You are where you are and that is that. It really is that simple. 

Now go be awesome (and comment below if this resonates with you). 

 Jennifer Trask - First


Written by Jennifer Trask at 18:28

User Comments

Jennifer Trask

You're welcome Tara Woodruff! I hope you are happily enjoying the break from it!! :)

Tara Woodruff

OoO I Know I have Been Guilty Of Shoulding Myself! Great post! Thank you!

Jennifer Trask

haha anytime Virginia! :)

Jennifer Trask

Hi Dominique,

Fun! It's interesting how the universe works like that. :)

When building your business there are so many 'shoulds'!! It's important to keep them at bay so you can focus on the most important ones and actually get them done (then there are no 'shoulds'). Patience is the key. :)

Enjoy reconnecting... it will enable your computer tasks to be more productive. Yahoo!!

Virginia Reeves

You are where you are, accept it and then move forward. Definitely. Shoulds mess with the overall energy needed by our mind and body. Thanks for a fun way of expressing it Jennifer.

Dominique Hurley

Funny Jennifer - there must be a universal shoulda wave going on -I just finished writing my next blog post about that too. Had to step away from the anxiety I was causing myself from all the shouldas of building my new online business. Changes of scenes (from my computer screen) and reconnecting to the bigger picture of life are so important!

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